Disconnecting In the Depth of the Fire – Activating Recovery Mode
As entrepreneurs and professionals doing hard things, we go through very many highs and lows. Sometimes the lows are extended, where the challenges just seem persistent over a longer period of time. This is not uncommon when we are doing difficult things and especially when we are moving the company through the most difficult phases that often come before a major breakthrough. We may be getting customer complaints before we are able to finalize that improvement to the product or service. Those may pile up and feel even more difficult as we let go of or lose people as we transition the company organizationally. Even further compounding the challenges can be financial underperformance adding urgency and maybe even investor scrutiny.
In the midst of times of fire, how we show up is particularly important. Can we stay present and grounded with access to our intuition and best decision making? Can we stay connective so we don’t disenfranchise our best people but can engage them in solving problems with us?
The key to showing up like this is being able to stay healthy, rested, and focused in the midst of all of it. The key hindrance to that, I have found, is the constant rumination that tends to ensue in difficult times. We go into over drive, trying to solve problems around the clock. We are never able to let go, never able to relinquish our role as CEO/entrepreneur. We exhaust ourselves. Sleep suffers. A downward spiral sets in.
If you are self aware on an even more nuanced level, you may notice that the underlying root cause to the rumination is a fear of failure combined with a high need for control. You see challenges and a low grade panic sets in behind the scenes that thrusts you into action to take control of whatever is not going right and urgently do everything you can to fix it. Of course this is not a bad tendency and one can see why it developed evolutionarily. However, solving the challenges of business is not well suited to this more frantic approach, but to a more calm, cool and collected way of being.
What I have found to be the best skill in times like these is to coach the mind into relaxation. In addition to good exercise, nutrition and meditation, in times like these, I have to go a step further and coach the mind to let go. There are five key reminders that I find work best for my mind when I experience intrusive ruminating thoughts in time that is intended to be recovery time.
Here is how I coach my mind. I have memorized these and repeat them every time a ruminating thought comes up about work. I take deep breaths as I state these internally. I feel the new energy in my body.
5 Reminders for My Mind in Time of Extreme Rumination:
There is no actual lack of safety here for me. I am safe. No matter the outcome of this endeavor, I will actually be ok. Deep breath. Relax.
I am grateful. No matter the challenges at hand, in fact, I am lucky and grateful to be at the helm of this endeavor and have the opportunity to lead it. I am not in war or serious illness as so many around the world are right now.
I am surrendered and in full acceptance. I fully accept the reality of what is around me exactly as it is. I accept my team exactly for who they are. I don’t fight reality. All change and progress begins with this radical acceptance that doesn’t fight with what is.
I trust myself. I trust that my intuition and skills will kick in when they are needed in order to solve problems. So when I’m not working, I trust and relax and allow myself to stop thinking about work.
I embrace the present moment. My nature is to be in this very moment, enjoying the nuances of my current experience through my senses. I am not a perpetual problem solver for this business. I relinquish that role in this moment, tune into the beautiful colors, sounds, experiences in my immediate surroundings, and allow myself to take joy from the present moment.
I hope that these reminders can be of help to you to move past rumination and get that crucial recovery time that is needed to come back strong when you’re ready to work again. Maybe these 5 resonate or, maybe for you, it’s another set of reminders. But one thing is for sure – this mind is coachable. If you find it constantly ruminating, be a great coach to yourself and find a way to calm it down and relax.
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